Namaste

Our 1st & 2nd grade teacher, Mrs. Ostergen, always used to tell us that "great minds think alike," which is why it came as no surprise when we discovered that NPR ran a segment on recent talks to secure a position for competitive yoga on the Olympic roster.

It was only last week we were discussing the feasibility of Olympic shoulder stands in 2012. We think we got a shot at it.

Yoga Twists Its Way to Olympic Spotlight

Trials and Tribulation

Occasionally, some of us at CFW get to go out of town for the weekend. Not even really out of town, more like up north...but honestly, we'll take what we can get. Even though I was enjoying myself at the beach and reading a book for leisure, I made sure to get home in time for these awesome events -

1. Michael Phelps (wearing the leggings version of the Speedo LZR, mind you) breaking his previous world record in the 400 Meter IM with the help of a little healthy competition from Ryan Lochte. His time clocked in at 4:05:25. Oh yeah, Ryan Lochte also touched in under the previous world record at 4:06:08. The previous world record? 4:06:22
2. Katie Hoff, the youngster who was just 15 in Athens, swam to a world record time of 4:31:12 in the 400 Meter IM and earned herself a spot on the Olympic team.
3. The race that produces the "fastest man in the world" lived up to its name as Tyson Gay ran the fastest 100 meters ever recorded in any weather. He clocked in at an astonding 9:68. Now, I don't know if anyone else watched this, but even I was screaming at the TV. It was beautiful. Unfortunately, he was not awarded the world record because the tail wind was over the allowable amount (any wind above 2.0 meters/second).

So, on the first night of Olympic trials, we all had the opportunity to see what the Americans are made of. Jamaican sprinters Usain Bolt and Asafa Powell better be paying attention...just because it's not techincally a world record doesn't mean Tyson Gay isn't the fastest man alive. Ian Thorpe (the "Thorepedo" as he's known around the world) of Australia commented last week that Michael Phelps will never break the record for most medals in an Olympic games. Maybe he doesn't know that Mr. Phelps takes comments like those and eats them for breakfast, tapes them up in his locker for motivation, and then shatters world records. Katie Hoff knows what it's like to fail (as evidenced by her performance in Athens) and takes that confidence and experience into her races.

Did I mention that we have an entire week of Trials? Oh, and the actual Games?

It's only the beginning.

Records are meant to be broken

Fastest man in the world

How Do You Stack Up Against Kenya?

Want to know exactly how high the Kenyans are raising the marathon bar? Here's a taste:

We've recently taken up running, and with it, enough magazines and conditioning routines to graduate us up from novice to medium grade novice

We do:
1/2 mile @ a 8:34 per/mile pace
1 mile @ 7:30 per/mile pace
1/2 mile @ 8:00 per/mile pace
1/2 - 1 mile @ 6:45 per/mile pace (At which point we are basically sprinting and gasping and sweating and preying for death)

Compare this with the Olympic hopefuls marathon pace:

London marathon champ Martin Ley just completed his race at 2:05:15, which if our math is right, comes in at a blistering 4.8 minute mile. He's on the Kenyan national team along with the likes of Robert Cheruiyot, Boston marathon champ. And just in case, William Kipsang, who ran away with the Rotterdam Marathon title just a week ago, setting a new course record of 2:05:49, has been included as a reserve, as has the reigning World Marathon champion Luke Kibet.

Yet despite all the firepower, Kenya has never won an Olympic gold in marathon.

Can they break the jinx this year?
Not if Mexico has anything to say about it. We have it on good authority that the marathon is a Mexico national obsession
The fastest Latin American female marathoner ever, Madaí Pérez, will lead the Mexican 42.195km team in the 2008 Olympic Games

We'd go on, but there's so much more...

Addicted

When we were kids, growing up in Juneau, AK, we didn't have a t.v. But the folks did have an old computer monitor they kept in their closet that had an adapter for bunny ears. Every four years, they would bring that monitor out and set it up in the living room of our apartment and for the next two weeks, we could watch as much of the Olympics as we wanted.

We had crushes on the following:

1. Dominique Dawes
2. Kim Zmeskal
3. The person who okay this event:

In the year 2000, trampoline was added as an Olympic discipline under gymnastics. In trampoline, gymnasts perform high-flying flips and twists on every bounce.

4. Sarah "Take That China" Hammer

Evolution

Ancient Greeks used to compete in the nude so that nothing would compromise their abilities. It seems we are getting close to that idea with a little help from technology. Let’s take a look at the new Speedo, shall we??

This suit combines four innovations to maximize a swimmer’s potential for medal winning mania–
1. A densely woven nylon fabric with seams that are welded together
2. An “internal core stabilizer” that basically acts like a corset for a swimmers body
3. Polyurethane panels that act as a drag-reduction measure
4. A three dimensional pattern instead of a two dimensional one that hugs the body like a second skin

Wow. That's a lot of stuff for one swimsuit. Remember the olden days when you used to just wear three swim suits (drag suits) to those early morning swim practices? Then, the days of your meets you wear your special Speedo and you just felt so fast? I do. It wasn't really special, perhaps a few colorful patterns and even some shimmer (I had two Speedos with shimmer, I loved them, I wish I still had them), but they were great and I felt fast, even if I wasn’t really fast.

I guess feeling “special” just isn’t enough anymore. These new suits, which debuted in February, have quickly become the talk of the swimming world…promoting much debate and even lawsuits by other swimsuit companies. Already, 38 records have been broken by swimmers wearing the Speedo LZR. Oh, and did I mention that it costs $600 (if you could even get your hands on one)? Oh, and this is one of the best parts, it takes 20 minutes to even get into the thing. I’ve always been told if you can’t get into something within 5 minutes, there’s no point in wearing it.

Frankly, I miss my old Speedo. I miss the shimmer. Mostly though, I think I miss seeing this throughout the Olympics -











Speedos!

Every Effort Counts

It is beyond ironic that one of the world’s most polluted cities will host this year’s “Green” Olympics. We read somewhere that in a recent ranking of 72 major world cities, Beijing came in dead last for overall environmental livability. As all eyes turn to Beijing this summer we are curious to see how she’s going to clean up her act.

Here is some of what we found out:

Beijing will ban cars on alternate days from July 20, depending on whether their number plates end in odd or even numbers, a measure which authorities hope will take 45 percent of the city’s 3.29 million cars off the roads and reduce car emissions by 63 percent.

Also, open letters published in state newspapers call upon citizens’ sense of civic duty and urge them to choose public and other ‘green’ sources of transportation as a means to help make the Olympics a national success. Factory closures and construction bans are also being implemented as a means to cut back air pollution.

The list of immediate remedies goes on and on. But is the word “immediate” problematic? Aside from creating a safe place for the Olympics, what value do these immediate remedies have if no long-term changes are made?

CFW is going to look into how the Olympics have influenced Beijing’s and China’s long-term efforts towards environmental sustainability. In the meantime, we want to leave you with this thought.

During a speech at Radio City Music Hall last week, Bill Clinton addressed our own country’s green movement. With regards to the value of small green efforts vs. long-term systems he had this to say:

Don’t make the perfect the enemy of the good.

In other words: every effort counts.

Maybe it’s just me, but that idea is so utterly American. And on a hot sunny day like today, it makes me want to go buy hot dogs and a watermelon. Organic, of course.

More on Beijing's Efforts

Work Ethic Pt. 2

The material point it seems, is not the lengths that Chinese athletes will go for gold and country, but the complete foreignness that level of commitment has become to our athletes, to our notions of career, our relationships, our democracy.

It's that systemic approaches to culture, the "we're all in this together," mentality that built the railroads, right? Oh wait, did the Chinese do that too, have we come to a historical consensus?

The US used to hold it down on the socialist tip. Martyrdom for the greater good used to garner you legend status. Remember our boy?:John "Bad As You Can Be" Henry

And now, in days when where we find that on the national stage there is nothing to be gained except that which you can take, it's refreshing to see that Chinese athletes aren't bogged down with this constrictive sense of individualism that had ground western thinkers and doers alike into submission with the hedonistic pursuit of Halo 3 and iPhones.

Down here in the NO, where we put our asses on the line for a lost cause everyday, there's something mad inspiring about a person who decides their gonna go headlong into an endeavor, no matter how futile.

Besides, sacrifice pays out!
China to Wins More Medals Than Us

Work Ethic

“Don’t retreat from the front lines with a light injury.”

This is a Communist war slogan that’s used by Chinese athletes and coaches and seems they are living up to it….well, multiplied by about 15…

Pressured by the national athletic system and tempted by the commercial riches awaiting star performers in the 2008 Games, China’s athletes are pushing themselves to their limits and beyond, causing some to risk their health in pursuit of nationalist glory.

Now I’m sure we’ve all done things we weren’t supposed for the fun, or for school, or for anything really…that last shot that puts us over the edge of reason, the third piece of cake, the $600 pair of shoes on the credit card…wait, I guess none of those are really for nationalist glory…but you get the point, right?

Serious injury? Let’s see what that equates to in Chinese athlete terms – blindness, permanent ankle injuries, and, oh wait, death. The crazy thing is that coaches (and sometimes even the athletes) dismiss the pain and agony, saying they “had too much concern for their injuries.”

What do these athletes receive for their struggles? If they succeed it’s gold medals, national glory, money, recognition….not to mention that extra pressure they get for the NEXT go around. What if they don’t succeed? Well, they are shame to their country, naturally.

Think about this – the next time you procrastinate or don’t quite give it 110%…..remember the Chinese gold medal winning diver – Hu Jia – who could go blind with every dive he takes. Think about the fact that although he’s not even guaranteed a spot on this year’s team – his determination to succeed and work his way back from his injury was so strong that he decided to forgo anesthesia during eye surgery because he thought it would speed up his recovery.

As for me….I’m going to the beach.

50 Ways to Shame Your Country

Logic

Out here in the Big Apple Olympic opinion is like one of those grade school logic problems. Everyone we talk to brings something different to the table and sometimes it's hard to make sense of it all. But let's give this one a go...

Yesterday morning on the uptown A train, Senegal read 17 articles from 26 international sources. Over dinner at Blue Ribbon Sushi, Canada and Yemen discussed 15 different Olympic topics. The A train was running local from W 4th street to Columbus Circle.

If the uni sashimi came with a side of brown rice and the population of Yemen is 22,230,531, then according to the official CFW countdown, how many days is it before the Olympic equestrians rock out in Hong Kong?

Stumped? So were we. Today is Friday after all.

The answer is fifty-fucking-one.



August 9-21 at the Beas River venue in Shatin, Hong Kong baby. Bring it.

We can't f*&kn wait.

Naysayers

We know there are a lot of folks out there who got negative opinions of the Olympics. People got to harp on the US and our foreign policy, the oppressive childhoods of Olympic hopefuls and the hundreds of wasted hours spent under the tyrannical tutelage of overbearing coaches and parents (cuz they watch too many movies). They tout steroid scandals and pollution.

What we at CFW want to put out to these critics is, "When was the last time you were the best in the world at something?"

When was the last time you woke up in the morning and thought, "Damn, not only am I pretty f*&kn good, I might just be the best there is, maybe ever, at this one thing."

How high can you jump? How fast can you run? How straight can you shoot an arrow, and moreover, how consistently can you do it?

It's the olympics,people. Meaning that the best in the world all converge on one spot (this year the hilariously public-image conscience China)to do battle with skills that put us mere mortals to shame.

Need a reminder?
Let's review:
1) Jessie Owens
2) Kerri Strug
3) Greg Luganious

Here at CFW, we ain't the best in the world at nothing, but we sure as shit wish we were and in 49 days, when the best in the world converge on Beijing, China, we're gonna be watching with the appropriate amount of sheer awe.

Get with the program.

Olympic Spirit - Middle East Peace Edition

With all this talk about animosity towards China and Olympic Torch protests I can’t help but feel slightly positive when I read something like this in the NY Times -

Israel offered on Wednesday to start direct peace talks with Lebanon, saying all issues would be negotiable including a tiny piece of Israeli-held land on the countries’ mutual border that Israel has long argued does not belong to Lebanon but that the Lebanese say is theirs...The announcement comes amid intense regional diplomatic activity, including the planned start on Thursday of a six-month truce in Gaza between Israel and Hamas, the Palestinian militant group, and the end of a second round of indirect negotiations between Israel and Syria.

“Intense diplomatic activity” makes me feel like the Olympic spirit has finally started to seep in somewhere…although I’m sure factors like land disputes, starvation, and death have something to do with these peace negotiations. But think about it – the Olympics is a time and place to bring people together. And nothing says together-ness like Middle East peace talks and the Olympic Games. Maybe this is the year that Lebanon’s basketball team qualifies for the tournament and beats Coach K and his cohorts into the ground or Israel’s Niki Palli takes it all in the high jump. It’s just a thought…But a heartwarming one indeed.

Remember the 2004 Iraq soccer team that made it all the way to the Bronze medal game? An Iraqi man had this to say: "It's like our souls were playing," he said. "You can see outside, there are no cars on the street. It's quiet. It's a great and a beautiful feeling to see this." Sports events can have a healing effect…just ask people here in Detroit when the Tigers won the 1968 World Series. This is what the Olympics Games are all about, folks. Hopefully, this year Arabs and Israelis can unite in the pure joy of the sport….perhaps even peace.

There is an Arab proverb that loosely reads -

against his brother,
with his brother against his cousin,
with cousin and brother
against the stranger.

2008 could be the year that the “cousin and the brother” unite instead of coming to blows. It’s strange what the Olympics can do…even if it’s just that underlying electricity flowing through our veins.

Who knows? But until then, I will eat my kibbee and watch how it unfolds.

Middle East peace negotiations

Deception Down Under

Aussie jock, Kylie Wheeler, is disappionted by Athletics Australia's recent decision to boycott opening ceremonies due to concerns that Beijing pollution will jeopardize the health of their track and field athletes. In yesterday’s edition of The Sydney Morning Herald, Wheeler commented on the opening ceremonies, stating: "I know the motivation and excitement it generates....it's really important for my preparation; I get excited about it, and from that I get really motivated." Clearly she sees the ceremonies as fundamental to her Olympic experience.

Maybe, just maybe, Athletics Australia is pulling a smog, I mean, smoke in mirrors trick here. There is concern across the board about China's pollution problems and the threats it poses to athletes' health. It would be very easy for a country to cry wolf and then duck out of the opening ceremonies as a "protective measure" when in fact it is simply a ploy to get their athletes even more fired up.

Stay with me here for a moment. We all know from experience that a little anger goes a long way in the gym. I would wager that sly Aussie officials are operating on that same theory. Countless grueling miles of training lead these athletes to the Olympics, the apex of their careers. The opening ceremonies are symbolic, essential. Being mandated to miss the ceremonies will leave them feeling cheated and seething with anger. Athletics Australia is hoping to harness that fury and use it to take the gold in track and field.

Sneaky and deceptive? Absolutely. But we would be fools to expect anything better from a penal colony.

Read More on the Aussie Opening Ceremonies Boycott

The 2008 Name Games

We at Can't F*&N Wait 4 2008 are hardly alone in this edge-of-our-seats anticipation for the Olympics. Over on the other side of the world there is a whole generation of children whose hype will live on, long after the torch has passed. As reported by the BBC, the Chinese are rather fond of naming their progeny after common events and popular slogans.

More than 4,000 children in China have been given the name Aoyun, meaning Olympic Games, in the past 15 years. The rise in popularity of the name is seen as a sign of support for the Games being staged in August in Beijing.

Being a child of the 80s, I’m just grateful that my mama had enough sense not to name me Rubik’s Cube.

Chinese babies named 'Olympic Games'

Hype

Can't F*&N Wait 4 2008 is all about hype. We got correspondents in the NO, Detroit, and NY. Sort of like a boutique t-shirt shop, except totally about the greatness that is the Olympics. Summer especially.

Need reasons to get hyped on the Olympics this year:
1) China
2) Americans get to act like Latin American soccor fans
3) This story:

The Jamaican sprinter, Usain Bolt, who doesn't even consider the 100 meters his best race, set the world record Saturday night with a time of 9.72 seconds at the Reebok Grand Prix, .02 seconds faster than the old record held by his countryman, Asafa Powell.
More About One Super Fast Dude

Speedos are the New Black - Olympian Sighting

Apparently, even world-record holding, multi-gold medal winning Olympic athlete Michael Phelps needed a break from his grueling schedule to peruse the never-ending sales racks at Nordstrom’s this weekend. I mean, it was the Half-Yearly Sale for Men and maybe he needed something other than Speedos to wear in China…although I can’t understand why anyone would walk around in anything BUT a Speedo.

I am, however, a tad concerned that this shopping excursion will detract from Mr. Phelps’ seven day, five hour workouts where he burns more than 3,000 calories. Seriously – 3,000 calories in one day. He also eats between 8,000 and 10,000 calories a day….that’s a lot of pancakes (I once read somewhere that he ate a lot of pancakes to fulfill his daily caloric intake). I might have seen a protein bar in his hand, so he had 9,750 calories to go for that day. I saw you with a friend too...I'm shocked they don't understand the importance of you being in the pool.

In the US, we like breaking world records, Guinness records, and just records in general…In China, Michael Phelps is expected to swim in at least 8 events…with the possibility of adding two more. In Athens, he won 8 medals (six of them gold)…more medals that 177 entire countries total. We love records so much that NBC begged the International Olympic Committee to reschedule the swimming meets to ensure Michael Phelps is seen in Prime Time.

So at that moment, it might have seemed important to try on that marked down pair of designer jeans but really let’s put things into perspective – When Speedo dangles $1,000,000 in front of you to break Mark Spitz’s record of 7 gold medals in one Olympic Games, you need to put down those jeans and get back into the pool.

We need more medals, we need more records, we need bragging rights, and really, we need you back in that Speedo.

Remember, there’s only 52 days left to the opening ceremonies. I hope Mr. Phelps is carrying the flag.

(Check out http://sports.espn.go.com/oly/index for up an up to the SECOND countdown.)

Seriously

We can't fucking wait for the 2008 Olympics. Only 54 more fucking days, brah. We woke up this morning and put on our 1980 Levis commemorative collared shirt and we just knew. We just knew team USA was gonna clean up.

Here are some countries we totally wanna beat:

Mexico
Canada
Belarus
Zambia
Costa Rica
Australia - We mean, come on people, Australia is such a wanna be US. Those guys totally bite our whole style down to our creative use of the English language. Hell we might have to start a We Can't F*&kn Wait to Destroy Australia in the Medal Hunt blog.

In fact, give us a few minutes to set it up.